Ever wondered how to show affection to your ex-boyfriend? Not all relationships end acrimoniously. If you still want to maintain remain on good terms even after the relationship has ended, here are some things to keep in mind.
Some relationships end due to dramatic and fiery conflicts. However, not all relationships end so harshly. Sometimes external forces like a job can prevent a relationship from working, and sometimes you simply recognise that things work better as friends than as lovers. In cases like these, figuring out how to make the transition from intimate lovers to friends can be very complicated. Even the most polite gestures can give mixed signals. It can make healing more difficult, and even reopen old wounds.
And you may ask: How can I safely be affectionate with my ex-boyfriend? The fact is, when it comes to matters of the heart, there is very little you can do to be completely “safe”. Even if you have no contact with him at all, your memories of him can lead to you romanticizing or demonizing the relationship. However, there are some ways to foster a good friendship even with an ex-boyfriend.
While it may seem a little strange at first, following established social conventions can be a surefire way to reconnect with your ex-boyfriend. Greeting him with a handshake when you meet him may seem strange at first, but don’t assume a hug is welcome without asking first.
Don’t assume a hug is welcome without asking first
When trying to figure out where the comfortable boundaries of the relationship are, it may be worth sticking to harmless topics. It doesn’t mean you have to be boring. Talk about current events or movies you’ve seen. Sharing laughter is a great way to show affection for each other without running the risk of moving into emotional territory that either of you will be uncomfortable with.
One of the hardest habits to avoid when a relationship ends is affectionate contact and shared physical space. Make an effort, but at the same time don’t make a big deal out of it if either of you slip a little.
If you find yourself getting too agitated while spending time with your ex-boyfriend, it may be a sign that it’s too soon to even consider it. Often, a physical break is a good way to start the healing process, and trying to force affection when it causes you distress is usually not a good idea.
It is not obligatory to be affectionate with your ex. If you find that there is too much pain and anger to actually follow the above social guidelines, then perhaps you should make a graceful exit and continue to let the healing process happen. When the time is right, you’ll know, because it won’t be hard.
It is not obligatory to be affectionate with your ex
And so there you have 4 tips on how to show affection to your ex-boyfriend. Remember that you are trying to develop a new relationship, a friendship, and it may not be anything like the old one. Starting from scratch and slowly exploring the new boundaries of what feels comfortable should be an experience that you both feel comfortable with without causing either of you undue drama.