Good tidings to all! I come bearing news of a topic that is sure to dampen spirits… just a tad. So. Cheating. Whether it’s happened to us, someone we know, or (possibly) we’ve partaken in it, we all know how tough it can be. To hear about, to get through, to move forward from (whether that’s with the partner or alone.) However, especially when you’re happy and things have been going swimmingly, it can be hard to see the signs. It’s hurtful to think about, but something to bear in mind. Plus, if you’re here you must already have some inklings that something is not quite right. So, here are 5 signs your partner may be cheating…
They’re starting to hide things
If you’ve always been quite open with each other and they start to pull back, that could be a sign of cheating. When they stop keeping you aware of their routine, they stop telling you about people they work with or what they’re thinking, they could be getting close to someone else.
In any relationship, it’s difficult to know every single thing about each other. People evolve (or don’t, then that’s a whole other issue) over time. However, a sudden change in communication could be a sign. If not cheating, it’s still something that should be discussed if the change is a problem for you.
There’s a sudden change in their appearance
A whole new wardrobe? Is that a… drastic new hair cut?! Did they… just say you’re going to the gym again?! That’s not like them… Granted, living a healthy lifestyle is never a bad thing. However, if it all seems a bit sudden? Might be a red flag for cheating. Especially if it’s not something they’d ever mentioned before.
Of course, they could just feel like they’re in need of a makeover, but at this stage they’d at least ask your thoughts on it, right? Even if it was just them thinking aloud. Unless, you’re not the one they’re trying to impress…
They disappear for extended periods at a time
Firstly, just want to say that co-dependency is not healthy. Couples should be able to be their own person, as well as being in a relationship. They can still lead their own lives and don’t have to be attached at the hip. They also don’t need to give each other updates on every little thing they do. That being said, if you’re a couple that checks in regularly throughout the day and your partner just keeps disappearing for a long time, it could be another sign.
There are a lot of other alternatives, maybe they just need some time alone and don’t know how to say as much. However, if they can’t explain where or what they’re doing in those times and get cagey when asked, could you have caught them in a lie?
They have friends that cheat
This is definitely not always the case. If one friend in a group is cheating, that doesn’t automatically mean they all are. That being said, friends who are cheating are likely to use each other as alibis. They’re all in the same boat, they got each other’s backs. Also, less likely to judge.
At the very least, they might go ‘hunting’ together to meet people. Nothing says group activity like being in the cheating game together, amirite?!
They accuse you of cheating
Last, but by no means least. The oldest trick in the book. When you bring it up to them (likely before you’ve even uttered the c-word… cheating, it’s cheating. Keep it clean kids!) they’re already turning the tables on you making all kinds of accusations.
The point of this? Inflicting guilt, of course. They trust you, why can’t you trust them? It’s a classic case of misdirection. The idea of using your guilt as a distraction, buying them time to ‘figure their stuff out’. Whatever that means… anyhow, deflecting like that is not cool!
Phew! We made it through 5 signs your partner may be cheating and I know it wasn’t easy. If you have the signs and your gut feeling, what happens next is down to you. If you approach your partner and discuss the situation, it’s down to you (and only you) if things continue or if they end. Remember that. Good luck!