Turn on any random rom com and you’re likely to find more than a few of them have this one, consistent storyline. The protagonist is in love with one of their best friends. They either realise this over the course of the film or it’s always been the storyline. However, these films don’t exactly go into the ins and outs of dating a friend. They just go into the ‘and they live happily ever after’ part. Well, we know this is real life and that you might be going back and forth over the decision. So, let us help, here are 5 things to know if you’re thinking of dating a friend…
Be honest about your feelings
You’d hope that your friendship would already have the foundation of trust and honesty. That being said, if you’re thinking of dating a friend, it’s best to be honest about when those feelings started and why you like them.
However, you also have to be aware of what you want with them. If you want to try and build something or have a casual ‘arrangement’, you both need to be on the same page with that too.
You’ll already be aware of their quirks
One of the pros of dating a friend is that there hasn’t been any pressure in the ‘getting to know each other’ part. You already know their moods, their likes and dislikes.
Sure, there’s always more to learn about people, but you’ve already got those bases covered. That could make things easier. You already like them despite, now you’re on your way to loving them because.
You may be confusing friendship chemistry with relationship chemistry
One of the things to be aware of when thinking of dating a friend is that there is a difference between friendship chemistry and relationship chemistry. You could find yourself thinking that because you’re close and they make you laugh, you must fancy them…
However, attraction doesn’t always work like that. To borrow from the great works of Love Island, they might ‘be your type on paper’, but there could be that spark missing. The bit that would normally take you to relationship level. So, try and be aware of that.
Things could go either way
Disclaimer, just because you were friends first doesn’t necessarily mean you’ll be together forever. Like any relationship, if you’re dating a friend, it’ll still take work on both sides to make things flow. It can be easy to assume that just because you already had that friendship that nothing could go wrong.
Communication will still be key and there will still be times where changes in the relationship will require an adjustment period. Basically, don’t get complacent because you were friends first.
Maybe don’t involve mutual friends in the beginning
In the beginning stages of dating a friend, maybe don’t talk about it with mutual friends. Sure, it seems like the obvious thing to do. They know both of you, surely they’d give the best advice? However, it could end up with an awkward situation…
If things don’t pan out, they could feel stuck in the middle. Or they could try and push something that isn’t there because they think it’ll be easier for the group. It’s probably best to take your concerns to a person who isn’t a mutual friend. They might see a different perspective because they don’t know you both on that level. If things do progress between you two, then start making mutual friends aware of it.
So, there you have it. 5 things to know if you’re thinking of dating a friend. Obviously, it’s not always a big decision. Sometimes it just happens. However, if the friendship means a lot to you, it could be worth considering how things might pan out in the long run. After all, good, solid friendships can be hard to find.