*Extremely Robin Williams voice* Gooooooooood afternoon listeners and welcome to CLiKD Radio! The only station that you need for all your dating needs and we help prevent future dating horror stories!
(Disclaimer: CLiKD Radio doesn’t actually exist… (YET) So, for now, we’ll have to make do with the blog we all know and love.)
As today is National Radio Day, we thought we’d shift things up a bit. Break up our usual schedule with a bit of dating advice for the Romantically Challenged. This can include horror stories or awkward situations.
So, if you’re all ready to spill the tea ☕, we’ve just opened our phone lines.
Caller 1: Bad Reaction to Being Ghosted.
Caller 1: “Hey guys, so I went on this date with a guy (I know. Shocking 😱), and it was fine… but I wasn’t really feeling it. So, we messaged for a bit and then I ended up ghosting him. I know! Dick move on my part – but then he sent me a handful of salty and, sadly, aggressive messages. How can I avoid this in future?”
Hey caller, wow, that’s intense. Ok, well firstly ghosting someone is never a great thing to do and there are more mature ways to handle the situation. However, you DO NOT deserve to be treated like that by the guy. No one deserves to be treated like that and it sound like this guy was both unstable and incredibly immature.
Firstly, block him on any and all communication platforms, because you don’t need someone like that ever reappearing. Secondly, for future reference, it may end up that you are less likely to end up in a situation like that again (once again not that you deserve to be) if you send a message explaining how you feel, if and when you realise how you feel. At that point, you’ve done all you can do to be honest and clear. Plus, you’ve allowed the other person to move on.
Caller 2: Unexpected weather event
Caller 2: “So, I was on a date with a girl, going for a nice outdoor stroll up a hill when it started snowing… sideways. The girl I was with was wearing a very little amount of make up, but a combination the wind and snow moved her eye make up EVERYWHERE. I didn’t want to say anything, cause I didn’t want to make her feel self-conscious and it’s her agency etc… Then, after she went to the loo and discovered it for herself, she was subsequently super angry with me.”
Well, for a start, your efforts at modern feminism are admirable… your execution… not so much. If somebody is going on a date with you, imagine that they are probably intending to stay they way looked upon arrival. Aka. physicality, clothing and make up in tact. If any of such thing changes, i.e. cuts themselves falling over, rips jeans getting snagged on a table/bar or make up gets smudged, then they probably want to find out so they can make their own decision on how to fix the issue.
Caller 3: *Fishing rod noise* Yep… That’s a Catfish!
Caller 3: “Hey, I was waiting outside the bar that I’d arranged to meet my date at when this guy showed up. He was missing more hair than was shown in his dating profile pics… I also realised he’d hidden a bit of extra weight he’d put on since his latest pic was taken… He was a nice guy, but I felt like I was lied to and I’m not attracted to him. How do I say something without being too severe though?”
Being “catfished” is never great. In fact, it’s the root cause of a ton of dating horror stories. A lot of people have been catfished, even if it’s subtle it still counts. However, when it’s a more severe case, you can’t help but feel both let down and embarrassed. That said, it’s important to think of the other person as well. Without excusing what they’re doing, they may not actually understand or appreciate what they’ve done.
If they’ve decided to stay in contact with you after your date, make it clear to them that despite having a nice time (if you did) you aren’t interested in continuing anything. Depending on how you feel, maybe comment on feeing a tad led on by their pictures. Although, if you’ve not been too affected by it, then may be just leave it as is. Unless you’re wanting to give the guy a helping hand in his future dating endeavours.
Caller 4: Mutual Ghosting
Caller 4: “Just left this date and, whilst it was fine and definitely not bad, I really didn’t feel anything. I’m pretty sure the feeling was mutual, as there wasn’t much chemistry and we left things with a very run of the mill hug. I don’t really want to continue chatting as I thought we ended things in a pretty civil way and I’d rather not spend too much time with a situation that isn’t going anywhere.”
Well, dating is a two way situation. You don’t always have to be the one who messages first. Give it a couple days and if they don’t message you either, then you shouldn’t feel pressure to do so either. This is the ideal “Mutual Ghosting” case, where you both pretty much felt the same thing and let each other be. No mess or fuss.
There we have it listeners! Hope you got all advice you needed and keep listening out for your all the cures to your dating horror stories. Maybe we can help you avoid all that drama!