We’ve all heard of the common dating trends, ghosting, breadcrumbing,catfishing, kittenfishing… the list is endless. Well, there’s a new ‘trend’ doing the rounds at the moment that we have to talk about. You may have already heard of it, or experienced it and not known it had a name. I am, of course, talking about wokefishing. ‘Woke… whatnow?!’ I hear you saying, faces screwed up in pure confusion. Well, let me educate you. Take a seat, class is in session. According to the trusty platform, Urban Dictionary, wokefishing ‘is when a man, whom is talking to a woman, starts asking her vague questions regarding progressive causes, in an effort to determine her interest level, and then mirror her responses. Said man has no interest in the same groups or causes, and is just trying to find commonalities with the girl to get into her pants.’ Yup, this is a real thing that is happening and it is on the rise, so here are 4 signs of wokefishing…

• They really go out of their way to consistently mention their progressive views on dating apps

This is the time when they’ll really play up that they’re a feminist or they support LGBTQ+ rights or BLM. Any opportunity they have to bring it up on their profile or in the chat, they will. Sure, these can be natural conversation topics but, if it is wokefishing, it’ll be almost excessive. Maybe they’ll even start explaining to you why the movements are important. As if you wouldn’t know as an actual member of said community…

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Gone is the person online saying that women and men should

be paid the same and you’re left with someone openly slut shaming

women or fetishizing you because of your race, no thank you!

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• When you actually meet them, they’re the furthest thing from ‘woke’

Sure, they said they went to the women’s march or BLM protests when you were talking, but now that you’ve met them, they’re openly sexist and making racist comments they claim are just ‘banter’. When it’s wokefishing, the switch is almost instantaneous. Gone is the person online saying that women and men should be paid the same and you’re left with someone openly slut shaming women or fetishizing you because of your race, no thank you!

• When it’s time to be an ally, they’re nowhere to be seen

When they have the chance to stand up to discrimination, they’re either silent or participating in the discrimination and telling you that you’re being too sensitive. Classic wokefishing. It’s made even more shocking because at the start, they were all about telling you the many ways that they’ve been an excellent ally. In fact, they’re the type to talk about how ashamed of their privilege they are, but never do anything to use that privilege for good.

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They act as if because they’re ‘woke’ that gives them licence to

not acknowledge, or just discredit, what other people have lived

through just because they haven’t been through it themselves.

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• They’re always trying to play devil’s advocate

When they try and argue that privileged people are also marginalised, saying things like there should be a ‘straight pride’ or that there’s no such thing as white privilege. They just cannot help themselves (it seems) when people are sharing their experiences with discrimination. They act as if because they’re ‘woke’ that gives them licence to not acknowledge, or just discredit, what other people have lived through just because they haven’t been through it themselves.

So, there you have it! 4 signs of wokefishing and what it is. While there doesn’t seem to be a clear way to avoid being wokefished altogether, knowing the signs can help. You’ll be able to recognise when it’s happening and call them out, before telling them to do one. Just know that it’s not your job to try and make them a better person, that change should come from them. You don’t have to put up with that bulls**t at all!